The tide ebbs and flows- reflecting on the process of finding balance in the extremes.
Adelaide, South Australia. January 3, 2017.

Hot and Cold:

Selva YEG-GA came out to wander with me on my birthday. As a Brazilian stone it seems she still is not yet accustomed to the cold even though she was carved and conceived in Edmonton’s River Valley. So, she hid for a little over a month, and, finally decided that 38-degree Celsius weather was good enough.

Cheeky.

North:

For the past few years, I’ve peacefully and quietly spent my birthdays in Edmonton, and while they have been generally sunny, they were, paradoxically, also very cold. We’re talking about -20 to -40 degrees Celsius birthdays in one of the most northern cities in the world. The frosty winter climate meant that I tended to stay inside and celebrate quietly. Most people I knew usually did not remember my birthday or even what the temperature was on January 3 because they were still hungover from New Year’s celebrations. As I now recall, they lacked warmth in every sense of the word.

South:

Twenty-seven is probably not a memorable birthday for most people -- unlike “sweet 16”, or “legal 21”. The number tends carry an air of a quiet year, and it’s the kind of milestone that sits down to drink tea with you while marking a new tempo and some major shifts in your life. This was the first time in eight years that I didn’t spend my birthday with my soon-to-be ex-husband, and the first time in over ten years I could be found in one of the most southern cities in the world.

A new path.

Past:

Selva YEG GA speaks again. She stands tall on this small mound of sand -- turning her back to the scorching sun. Her shadow encompasses some kind of past she could have lived herself. She absorbs the sunlight and sits serenely absorbing the timeless sound of the waves.

Life happens in ebbs and flows.

Future:

I spent this particular birthday thinking about how to give meaning to this New Year. How I did I get here, what I had accomplished so far, and what do I want to accomplish in the coming months? If future me looks back, would she be satisfied with whom she turned out to be? I realized that amongst many things, what I want to do is to find comfort within myself to continue forward, to a place where I will find the strength within me that my female ancestors bequeathed me. To reconcile the calm and the storm within, and to find the balance in the endless paradox. In sum, today, I decided to occupy a new space with Selva and make it meaningful—reflecting on my future and how to take advantage of my time on earth.

With ambition.

Present Time:

Death and Rebirth; North and South; Bright and Dark; Future and Past.

Finding balance in the extremes.

On the Japanese education system and the bigger picture.
Mount Shosha, Japan. 4:54PM. December 3, 2016. 14° C.

Today was a perfect day for hiking Mount Shosha to the site of Engyoji, a temple with a 1000-year history, and where, many people know, “The Last Samurai” was filmed. As I wandered through this beautiful site with friends, I walked by this particular Buddha statue and it caught Selva’s eye. You can tell she liked posing here ;)

Throughout the day, the fresh mountain air, the crisp weather, and the larger historical context of the temple (a site for monk education) had me thinking about Japan and its education system. I thought about the work I’ve been doing for the past few months. I thought about my students and how education here vastly differs from the Colombian and the Canadian pedagogical models I experienced. Harmony over individuality -- the Buddhist approach?

Where do I fit in in the bigger picture?

I was hired as a public servant, as an ambassador of Canada who fosters global education in Japan. Many times I questioned myself if I was being put to good use. Sometimes, I sit at my desk for days without much to do because I’m not needed. Sometimes, I’m just a human recorder to my students. Sometimes, I live great moments with the students, but, sadly, they have to memorize instead of learning the material “at the end of the day”.

This is bigger than me.

The education system in Japan is confounding. When you hear of Global Education, you think of internationalization and asking yourself big questions. How people can connect and learn from each other in the global stage despite having different cultural backgrounds and linguistic barriers? How can I teach and share with my students who are encouraged to memorize everything, and have little to no time for other things outside their club activities and strict schedules?

I can’t change an education system, and I realize that’s something I have no desire to do now that I have gained further experience abroad. And my time here has been a valuable teaching experience thus far, for both my students and I. I’ve learned how to adapt to different teaching methods. Often, I find myself mesmerized by the students’ tenacity and resistance in the face of such a strict and demanding educational system; by their “uniform unity”, their commitment to strength in numbers and their beautiful teamwork. But teaching has been a two-way street. My students have learned to contest many preconceived ideas with my arrival and presence alone and, as I have learned, you can be a dual citizen and can find a sense of belonging with different cultures despite your ethnicity.

Perhaps my personal observations might seem insignificant within the “bigger picture”, but, just like Selva is very tiny when compared to the Buddha statue, I take comfort in that I’m occupying a new space and making history on my own. And I value that.

Death and Birth on Sacred Grounds
4:42PM, November 23, 2016. 13°C.

Although I have been living in Japan for three months now, Selva YEG-GA spoke to me during my second trip to Kyoto, on my first visit to one of the many temples of this city. I think it made sense for her to begin her adventures in Japan once she realized I had settled in, as moving countries is often a tedious process. We both needed to find our physical balance in order to get in touch with each other, it seems. As we walked around the temple together, I observed how the beauty of the Autumn leaves announced their imminent Death, as if though they had decided to make their exit in style. Red, orange, and yellow are in vogue!

While Death is a taboo subject in many Western cultures, it is a normal part of life in Japanese culture, and Selva YEG-GA seems to be in alignment with this perspective towards Human Life Cycles. A quick reading of Baba Yaga -- the folkloric persona that influenced the name of the YEG-GA carvings -- reveals she was associated, amongst many things, with Death. I think Selva YEG-GA wanted to bring to my attention the contradictions of Death within my recent experiences. Autumn, the death of Summer, Japan, the end of my undergraduate university life, and the eight-year marriage with my partner. Neither Selva YEG-GA I mourned in the traditional sense. We both stood comfortably in the ‘now’ and reflected upon the ways Death brings about Life. Death is one side of the coin; the other side is Life. Death brings rebirth. It recycles Life. Though it is certain, it’s certainly not eternal.

Selva YEG-GA stood amongst these little Buddhas and told me about Death and Rebirth. And all about the exciting new opportunities that were to come, and the end of an old cycle. Out with the old, in with the new! Continue your path to enlightenment! Wisdom after all, doesn’t come without suffering. Such are Nature’s contradictory laws that informed of our first cognitive journey together.